Are you sporty? On a scale of one to 1-100, I’m 0. I know balls and things, but want no part of them. I mean, I’ve played on the company soccer team, and I do stretching and stuff to keep my spine from curling right over my keyboard. But watching sports? Get off, that’s my leg you’re pulling. Have you heard of “music anhedonia”? That’s when people don’t enjoy any music. Well, I suppose I have sport anhedonia. I’d pay to watch a UFC match between Elon Musk and, er, whoever is currently really...
12 days ago • 1 min read
I took a huge risk at the cinema this week. I went twice. Backrooms and Obsession. Backrooms received good reviews, but Obsession got better reviews. So we went to Backrooms first. Saving the best for last, a trick I picked up from Jesus in the Bible.* But Backrooms was fantastic. So I was terrified! That Obsession would disappoint me. I’m fussy about what I like. Ask Nadine if you don’t believe me. So two good films in a row seemed like asking a lot. But I loved it, too! Even the young ‘uns...
20 days ago • 1 min read
This might be controversial, but I prefer Douglas Adams’ Dirk Gently books to the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy. I re-read them this week, and couldn’t believe it when I saw 1987 on the copyright page. So I bought Dirk Gently’s Detective Agency when it first came out… 39 years ago! Which makes me 21-plus and a bit, I suppose. Luckily, we’ve aged well, for the most part. There’s a joke about not being able to get pizza delivered in London, which might have been cutting-edge at the time, but...
about 1 month ago • 1 min read
Some people are naturals. Taking the tram – again! I know! – a confused 12-year-old was pacing the tram from end to end. Sometimes he’d stop to stare at someone. Not aggressively, but as if unsure whether he knew them. Sometimes he’d stop to check under the seats. Then more pacing. This was a boy in urgent need of something he couldn’t find. But with plenty of attention. Everybody watched to see what he’d do next (and hope he didn’t do it near them). You could have flossed your teeth with the...
about 2 months ago • 1 min read
We’re in what used to be East Berlin. Tip: If there are trams, you’re probably in East Berlin. East Berlin had trams. West Berlin ripped them up for being old-fashioned and stupid. They’re regretting it now and want more, but trams still mostly don’t go further west than Hauptbahnhof (Main Station). So if you’re on a tram, you’re probably in old East Berlin. Seeing the most incredible things… Taking the tram yesterday, we passed a big vet (animal doctor, not war hero), and the surgery windows...
2 months ago • 1 min read
George Orwell had blue spots or circles tattooed on each of his knuckles. Probably done while he lived in Burma before becoming a writer. Possibly the tattoos are the reason he became a writer. “Writing can hardly be more painful than getting my knucks tatted,” he thought. “Let’s have at it!” The poor fool. Here’s the thing: What makes tattoos difficult is that you get only one chance to do it right. What makes writing difficult is that you get as many chances as you like. Unless you’re under...
3 months ago • 1 min read
My two favourite things are music and books. But I recently watched mclusky on KEXP and was blown away that some people can play music and sing at the same time. I don’t have the concentration to listen to the music and the lyrics at the same time. When I listen to music, I’m only listening to the music. Of course, I like a lot of growly metal, where the vocals sound like the Cookie Monster trying to eat his way out of a quarry. Good luck with those lyrics, but still. I’ve never been...
3 months ago • 1 min read
You know those Bic four-colour pens? A blue and white pen with four clicky buttons to choose black, blue, green, or red ink? They’re still around, and Bic is still selling millions. Back in the day, they were a minor status symbol in school. Either you were one of the cool kids with a Bic 4 Colour, or you were a lug. Unable to attend parties and other social occasions because you were too busy hauling four separate pens around. I want one. I still want one. I hadn’t thought about them in...
3 months ago • 1 min read
Terry Pratchett taught me that names have power. In doing so, he put me right off a lot of fantasy. Specifically, high or epic fantasy. Because I can’t stand the names. You know, like K’rniluf the Doomswerver. If I’m reading a book with a name like that, I’ll look at it once and never read it again. I’ll just skim it, relying on the shape of the word to get me through. Part of it is laziness. How do you pronounce K’rniluf? And why do I have to work it out, when the author couldn’t be...
3 months ago • 1 min read
